Extreme Shepherding

This is what happens when you are a farmer and have too much time on your hands. I dedicate this to my favorite sheepherders - my parents!

Book Review: Shake Hands With The Devil

Book Review: Shake Hands With The Devil by Romeo Dallaire

"This book is nothing more nor less than the account of a few humans who were entrusted with the role of helping others taste the fruits of peace. Instead, we watched as the devil took control of paradise on earth and fed on the blood of the people we were supposed to protect." - Romeo Dallaire

Beware. A friend of mine told me he read this book and immediately it put him into a three month depression. Although I did not have the same reaction, I too was moved and felt despair as I considered the heart wrenching story of one of the worst genocides of this past century as it took place in the country of Rwanda. How bad was it? Eight hundred thousand people were killed in 100 days. Most of them were hacked to death with machetes. Worse of all, it could have been avoided.

The book is written by General Romeo Dallaire, UN force commander of the 1993 UN intervention in Rwanda. Dallaire takes you behind the scenes at the UN, Canadian forces, and the peace initiative in Rwanda. He shares deeply from his thoughts and feelings about how things happened and how we tried to make things better but outside forces conspired against him. What transpires in the book is an emotional chronicle of the heroic efforts and sacrifices of many good people to try to save a country. At almost 600 pages it's not a slender book, yet I found it difficult to put down.

I've read the book twice and each time I'm struck anew with the evilness of human nature. The book practically drips with it and that's what makes it so overwhelming emotionally. One simply is not ready to hear the stories of barbarism that man is capable of. Yet page after page describes it - not only the direct barbarism of racists seeking to exterminate an entire group of people but also the discouraging nonchalance of bureaucrats and nations who by their indifference sustained the slaughter. Many times I found myself just feeling sad and shaking my head.

If you are into human rights, like war theory/history, or simply enjoy matter-of-fact style written biographies you will probably like this book. There is a message of hope at the end but it takes you over 550 pages to get there. This is an important book, perhaps the most important book written by a Canadian in the past 20 years. Rwanda must never happen again. 4.2 ninja stars out of 5.

Twilight Riding

Twilight: the time of day immediately following sunset; "he loved the twilight"; "they finished before the fall of night"

For the past two nights, about 20 minutes after sunset (while there is still just enough light to see your way) I have gone for a bike ride. Throwing on my old BCBC sweater and my helmet I grab my '94 Specialized Hard Rock and go for a ride around my neighborhood. There is enough light to still see where you are going but enough darkness that things feel magical and special. I have always enjoyed this time. You feel like you can ride forever. The first time I went I took a little river trail a few blocks away and it was pure bliss. Tight, twisting singletrack coaxed me to pedal faster and faster. I dutifully obeyed. Beautiful.

Last night it was a bit too wet for the river so I stuck to the roads and sidewalks. Again I pedaled hard, an old and worshipful tune from Mortal reverbrating through my head and I pedaled for all I was worth. In that moment I felt alive, at peace, and close to God. It was a time of pure joy.

I love my bike. I love it's heavy old school steel frame that seems so indestructible yet has enough give to soak up the bumps. It feels "lively," if steel can be that way. It was my first bike that I bought with my own money and it has outlasted its modern successor that I bought several years later. They don't make many steel framed bikes anymore and it's a shame.

It's time to buy a new bike but I already know that I'm not giving up my old one. I have too many memories and I'm way too emotionally attached. The only other thing I have been this attached to was my old Suzuki Sidekick, but even that is not in the same league. I can't say I ever felt close to God driving my Sidekick (the opposite actually!), but I have felt that many times on my old red bike. It makes me smile everytime I get on it.

The Temptation To Fake It

“The worst crime is faking it.” -Kurt Cobain

I was at a wedding this past weekend (which was really fun - seeing my past students getting married is always encouraging) and as I was watching people milling around the thought occurred to me "How many of these people are faking it?" By "it" I mean the positive and happy spirit that is punctuated by a "Great!" when asked how they are doing.

The reality is that being less then forthright about how we are doing at a public function is not necessarily terrible but it says something about our character. When someone asks us a direct question like "How are you?" you have 3 basic choices:

1. Be really honest. Ex/ "My spiritual life is in the toilet and we are $30k in debt - how do you think?"
2. Don't lie but don't share all (be vague). Ex/ "Could be worse," "Alright," "Not too bad."
3. Fake it. Ex/"Great! Couldn't be better! Can't complain about anything!"

Eventually faking it always gets us in trouble. It is deception and deception is wrong. In the above example the effects are minimal - we usually just feel deceptive which makes us feel worse about ourselves and more alone. But faking it in ministry is very bad. Faking it as a worship leader, faking it as a pastor, faking it as a (cough, cough) counselor - eventually it catches up with you. Living deceitfully always takes it's toll. Sometimes it results in moral failure, frequently it is burnout, depression, or losing one's faith.

Personally, I am tempted to fake it because it gets immediate results. We like not being real: we get to keep our job/ministry, people still think well of us, we avoid the awkwardness. But such rewards sacrifice long term health for short term gain.

I'm not saying we should be vulnerable and true with everyone but everyone should be vulnerable and real with someone. Vulnerability is not a sign of weakness - instead it's a sign of strength and courage. Vulnerability is a form of self-love and love for others. We need to realize that when we are in community fakeness affects everyone. When someone is fake it encourages others to be fake - when someone is real it encourages others to be real. One should also not use vulnerability as a way to get attention or to manipulate others - I have seen that happen and that is not good either. But fakeness eventually hurts everyone - you, me, our community, and eventually the body of Christ. Is there an area where your fakeness is hurting you/others? What can you do to change things?

The Power Of A Kiss . . .

If you want to be happy, healthy, successful, and live longer, give your spouse a kiss before you go to work each day. That's the conclusion of a study conducted by a group of German physicians and psychologists, in cooperation with insurance companies. According to Dr. Arthur Sazbo, the study found that those who kiss their spouse each morning miss less work because of illness than those who do not. They also have fewer auto accidents on the way to work. They earn 20 to 30 percent more monthly and they live about five years more than those who don't even give each other a peck on the cheek. The reason for this, says Dr. Sazbo, is that the kissers begin the day with a positive attitude. A kiss signifies a sort of “seal of approval” in the eyes of Dr. Sazbo and his colleagues and, they believe, those who don't experience it, for whatever reason, go out the door feeling not quite right about themselves.

Whether you give this study any credence or not, an "au revoir" kiss every morning can do you no harm! If you’re not a frequent kisser, why not try it every day for a month and see what happens? Acts of affection at the beginning of the day not only impress the receiver but transform the giver as well.

3 Wolf Shirt Goes Viral

You probably have already hear about this, but just in case you haven't:

Someone left a funny comment on an interesting T-shirt offered for sale on Amazon. Soon, people started responding to it and eventually it became it's own phenomenon. Read the story here, and read the actual reviews here. You won't be disappointed!

It's fascinating to see how things can go viral on the internet so fast. In a sad comment on some people's sense of humor, the company who actually makes the T-shirts (and is hugely profiting) is not so amused . . .

Christian Secular Culture Disclaimers (CSCD)

Last night my small group (bless their hearts) met and as usual had a great time. Our group is unstructured and mostly we just hang out, talking about our lives. We ended up spending a fair amount of last night discussing this humorous post from the blog "Stuff Christians Like" entitled:

#543. Throwing out disclaimers before you recommend something secular.

Basically the author writes about all the ways we try to justify the kind of things we as Christians entertain ourselves with. I thought it was honest, very funny, and packs a punch at the end. If you are looking for something to talk about in a small group or Sunday School class, I recommend it as an easy (translation: almost no prep - my favorite kind!) and thought provoking discussion starter. Like me, you may even feel challenged by it.

Protecting The (Dysfunctional) Church System

Here is a story I have heard way too often:

A pastor is doing well at his church. The ministry is thriving, the people like him, and real fruit is being shown in his ministry. As good as things are though, they are not perfect and some of his ideas are not being received well by someone in the church leadership team. Maybe the annoyed party is another pastor (if it's a large church) or someone on the board/elders team. Perhaps they feel threatened or perhaps they disagree with the pastor's approach or theology. For whatever reason instead of the annoyed person talking directly to the pastor in open dialogue, they instead bully the rest of the leadership team (or the pastor directly) to quit. A covert campaign is established (gossip, manipulation, and outright deception) and eventually the pastor can't take it any more and is forced out.

As bad, as evil as that is, what really bothers me is what often happens next. The church leadership team - heavily influenced by the church bully - tells the pastor that, "for the good of the church," to leave quietly. In some cases financial considerations (compensation) are attached to the pastor leaving quietly without "raising a stink" about what happened to them. The pastor believes the lie that if he would let the people in the church know about the underhanded and terrible way that he was treated that this would "wrong." He worries that it could divide the church, that he would be doing it out of bad motives, and that it would just be too much trouble and bring up the bad feelings that he is trying to bury. So he agrees not to say anything. The people are confused on why the pastor is leaving (except those in the know) and he exits the church defeated, angry, bitter, and disillusioned. The average churchgoer has no idea of the dysfunctional element in their leadership and the cycle begins again with the new pastor.

Depressing, isn't it?

What bothers me the most is not that church bullies hurt good pastors (although the tolerance of church bullies is a whole other rant which I will share another time) but the fact that the dysfunction within the church is not brought up to the light. Pastors justify their lack of sharing the truth with the congregation by believing the idea that they are saving the church from further strife and division, but really they are just prolonging the dysfunction. And the members of the leadership team, even if they don't agree with what happened, become part of the code of silence to "protect the church." Someone needs to tell the church the truth if there is to be any hope to fixing things! Someone needs to have the courage to stand up and say "Yes, I know this will be disturbing to you, but this is what happened to me and it was not right." Instead the pastors feel the noble thing to do is fall on their sword. They are encouraged in this by the dysfunctional leadership team and their misplaced concern for the well being of the church. Yet Paul was not afraid to publicly call Peter and the church of Jerusalem on their sinful actions, and neither should we. Could bringing to light what is happening in the church result in terrible things for you, your family, and your ministry? Absolutely, and it is a decision that must be weighed carefully. But to choose not to expose sinful actions in the church is nothing short then collusion with evil.

It is like being abused by your father and not telling your family because you don't want it to "create strife" or "damage your mother." But if you choose not to tell about the abuse, someone else in your family has a good chance of being abused as well . . . and I don't think they would be happy knowing that you knew and didn't warn them. Essentially this is what too often happens in churches - I know several that have dysfunctional leadership teams who have burned through several pastors, damaging them while the congregation was completely unaware. And these congregations would be outraged to know how these pastors were really treated, but they don't know if know one tells them, right?

Standing up and telling the congregation the specific things done to them that were sinful is not an easy thing to do. You may get great results or you may not. But at least you tried, and yes, you did the right thing. Whether you are a pastor or just a member of your congregation, we need to stand up for what is right. We need to call it as it is, no matter the consequences. The church, the system, depends on it.