nostalgia - (noun) the longing for something past.
I've decided I don't like moving very much. It's not so much the stresses of having to pack up and leave. It's the going through your stuff. When I go through my stuff I get terribly nostalgic. I am reminded about things and it makes me wistful, sad, emotional. Today I found:
-A picture of myself when I was Riker's age.
-A map of Belize (where we went on our second honeymoon).
-Old bike magazines and pictures.
-Letters from old friends.
-Memento's from my days as camp counselor (that I kept to remind to pray for my campers).
-Notes from those who I've ministered to and ministered to me.
-Maps from outdoor adventures with friends and family.
There is something very personal and unsettling about looking at one's old stuff. I find I don't want to throw anything out. I'm worried that if I do I will forget the precious memories and people who my "junk" reminds me of. I get nostalgic and I find myself almost overwhelmed by quick floods of emotion. Jobina is at camp this week with the kids so it's even worse. I find I have to take breaks from the packing just to keep myself together! Weird, usually I'm fairly even keeled emotionally.
Perhaps for me, moving is actually a good thing. It helps me to look beyond the immediate and remember the past. Remembering God's goodness and his blessings gives me joy but it also makes me sad. But I think it's a good kind of sad. The sad that brings a lump to my throat but a lump that I savor and don't want to go.
Well, that's enough of a break - I've got to get back to packing . . .
Church service at Holy Church near Rescue 1
2 days ago
4 comments:
i went through something kind of the opposite yesterday. i went through some of my boxes of stuff. to see what i own, what i might want to take to germany, etc. i ended up throwing a bunch of stuff out and sending stuff to the thrift store. things that just didn't need to be put back into storage. things i'll never miss. (i hope)
that said, all notes, cards, and pictures are stored in a different place and have yet to be looked through.
may your sorting go well, mark!
Hey Mark, I kinda feel opposite, as well! When I go through my old stuff, I usually just want to throw it all out. I realize how much I don't need that stuff, and feel better - clean, purged! after sorting and disposing of it.
I can see how it would be a lot more difficult to do while your family is away, though!
I think "purging" when you are moving is different. Already you feel like you are in transition and will be losing something and going through memento's just increases it. Of course it could be that I'm just a sap when it comes to such things!
I have an intense memory about where certain things came from and what was happening in our life at the time. Sometimes I worry that if I get rid of them I will forget those moments. I so relate Mark. Although, I enjoy a good purge, especially if it's kids clothes and broken toys!
Jacquie
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