Authenticity (being real) is something I value highly and yet it mostly seems to elude me. When I think of being authentic I see it as me being real with others. This usually involves not hiding my weaknesses or feelings. Today I realized that I've missed a big piece of it:
I need to be real with myself.
In other words, can I be honest with myself about who I really am? Shouldn't this be the starting point for being authentic with others? My spiritual director has been challenging me to accept my own poverty, and I think in our last session it finally sunk in. I realized somethings about myself that were truly . . . not good. Things about who I've been trying to be and why. I'm still processing it, and may share about it more in detail in a later post.
May Light increase.
Church service at Holy Church near Rescue 1
4 weeks ago
5 comments:
Totally imperative...or atleast vitally enlightening to the full spectrum of God's grace for sure. Seems like a LOT bigger of a gift when we see the real us!
...and penetrate our darkness (to your postscript)...:o)
It is so hard to be really and truly honest with ourselves. I struggle with this daily! Accepting that I don't make enough money to live the lifestyle I'm trying to live is just the latest lesson of many for me. I look forward to hearing more of your thoughts on this.
Have a great day!
Love, Michele
Evi: I lean more towards the imperative side of things. My ability to look at myself in the mirror allows me honestly reflect some of that to others. Being self aware about my dark side, my poverty, is really quite scary but I think necessary.
Michelle: Wow, thanks for your honesty. I like how you talk about "accepting" something. Perhaps sometimes we are kind of aware of our reality but we don't really accept it. I suppose being authentic is accepting that some things that we would rather not be true are indeed real.
I think I find that the struggle with my blog. I really want it to be about my journey, the one that I am on "to be alive and thirsty" as my blog name is. And a huge part of that is knowing myself fully and not just accepting that, but also working to change the things that I need to. I tend to struggle at times with not only being open about those things with those who may read my blog, but also being authentic with myself(as you put it).
Rayna: I suppose admitting the struggle to be authentic is the first step to becoming more authentic! And I think its supposed to be a struggle - accepting who one really is and trying to figure out how much to share about it with others.
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